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 (I'm brimming with rhetorical questions. This movie dumbfounds me. Is that a word? Can you be dumbfounded? And while we're here, why is it so damned hard to find a good bonsai tree? And why can the simple phrase "Ay! Must stay focus!" feel so inspirational and life-altering? All right, where was I?)

  • Apparently, the writers for "KKIII" had a meeting where this exchange happened:

    • Writer No. 1: "I think we should have The Rich Guy recruit a bully from out of town to help terrorize Daniel-San."

    Writer No. 2: "Yeah, we'll name him Mike Barnes ... He could be a renowned teenage karate champ with a mean streak."

    Writer No. 1: "That's just what I was thinking! Like an over-the-top Zabka!"

    Writer No. 2: "Yes! And in the Finals, Daniel-San somehow beats him."

    Writer No. 1: "Perfect! The audience will never see it coming!"

  • When Daniel-San finds out that The Rich Guy has been working for Creese all along, they confront him at the Cobra Kai studio, pushing him around a little, then crossing their arms and laughing like cartoon villains at him ("HAH HAHA HAH HAH!") before Miyagi saves the day. You can't even measure this scene on the Unintentional Comedy Scale. It's impossible. I can't believe everyone was filming that day with a straight face.
  • That reminds me, when you're watching this movie with buddies and pulling the "Mystery Science Theater" routine, remember this tip: Every time Daniel-San and Mr. Miyagi have a scene together, crack jokes in the Miyagi voice like, "Daniel-San, take off your shirt, Miyagi show you special massage trick."

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